Well, for those of you out there who want to know who I am... I am a mother, a daughter, a grand-daughter, and a sister. I am a girlfriend, a best friend, a lover, and a confidant. I am a student, a co-worker, and an employee. My days and nights are fairly routine, and probably not unlike millions out there. I wake up and try to get my sleepy 8 year old out the front door in time for school. That by itself is a miracle some mornings. We deal with the normal issues of not wanting to wake up and “Mom, I don’t want to wear that”. It is not unusual to hear “Ouch” coming from the bathroom when I brush her extremely long and tangled hair. “Mom, where are my shoes?” and “Mom, I need lunch money” are common morning phrases uttered at the front door. Then off to work I go, mainly to sit behind a desk and talk to people about their money… oh the exciting life of a bank teller… (You can hear the sarcasm in that statement, right?) I leave work and pick up my daughter from school or from her father on those rare occasions when he decides to help out. Then home to make dinner, help with homework, house cleaning, laundry, and the hundred other little chores. Needless to say, a majority of them I don’t get to, but I will get to them eventually, I promise. Bedtime is another frenzy of activity. Getting Becca into the bath is never really that hard to do… getting her out, on the other hand, is a whole different story. She loves to play in the tub, and I have to tell her multiple times a night to get out of the tub and into her pajamas. When I finally get her into her bed and she is quiet for the night, it is time for me to hit the books. I got a late start in college, thanks to a string of bad decisions, but what is the saying, “Better late than never”? I am working on getting my bachelors in Accounting, which is made more complicated by my schedule and the inherent challenges of online courses. Many nights I have dozed off at the computer or in a text book, just to drag myself to my room and crawl into bed.
Now things are pretty good. I feel like I am headed in the right direction for a change. I haven’t always felt this way. In fact, this didn’t happen until almost two years ago. As I mentioned earlier, I have made my share of mistakes. I am not an angel by any means. I allowed others to make my choices for me, and stuck my head in the sand when things got hard. Do you want to know what that taught me? Hiding from problems doesn’t make them go away. Wow that is pretty obvious, isn’t it? Well, ok putting it into practice isn’t as easy. I guess I finally got to a point when I looked at my life and I got tired of making excuses and wondering why I was so unhappy. It finally sunk into my somewhat thick head that I needed to get up and DO SOMETHING! (wow, another obvious point, right?)
I am extremely lucky though. I got out of a bad marriage with most of my sanity. I have a beautiful daughter who keeps me on my toes and makes me laugh every day. I treasure the little moments when she still crawls up in my lap and winds her arms around my neck. “Mom you’re the best” warms my heart every time she says it. I have a wonderful boyfriend who I love with all my heart, and who loves me just as much. He loves my daughter just as much as he loves his own son, and I am truly blessed for all that. It is hard because we are apart right now because of work issues... yeah, gotta love the military. We keep saying "soon", and I can't wait until it is for real. Long distance relationships are hard, but ours is very strong. He has taught me so much in the time we have been together that I really can't imagine going back to the life I used to live... and so from the ashes of my old life comes a new beginning.... lol
